For one of my courses I had to complete the MB/ Jung Personality Test... here are my profile results- and I think they are pretty accurate! I strongly recommend trying this test out (it was for a course of mine so by the results, and that fact I think its pretty legitimate and often given to students, etc. to find out what their personality strengths are and use them to their advantage).... heres the link:
http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp
OH and I don't expect you to read all of this- I just thought yall might like to take the test yourselves.
Definition 1:
The Giver
As an ENFJ, you're primary mode of living is focused externally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is internal, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.
ENFJs are people-focused individuals. They live in the world of people possibilities. More so than any other type, they have excellent people skills. They understand and care about people, and have a special talent for bringing out the best in others. ENFJ's main interest in life is giving love, support, and a good time to other people. They are focused on understanding, supporting, and encouraging others. They make things happen for people, and get their best personal satisfaction from this.
Because ENFJ's people skills are so extraordinary, they have the ability to make people do exactly what they want them to do. They get under people's skins and get the reactions that they are seeking. ENFJ's motives are usually unselfish, but ENFJs who have developed less than ideally have been known to use their power over people to manipulate them.
ENFJ's are so externally focused that it's especially important for them to spend time alone. This can be difficult for some ENFJs, because they have the tendency to be hard on themselves and turn to dark thoughts when alone. Consequently, ENFJs might avoid being alone, and fill their lives with activities involving other people. ENFJs tend to define their life's direction and priorities according to other people's needs, and may not be aware of their own needs. It's natural to their personality type that they will tend to place other people's needs above their own, but they need to stay aware of their own needs so that they don't sacrifice themselves in their drive to help others.
ENFJ's tend to be more reserved about exposing themselves than other extraverted types. Although they may have strongly-felt beliefs, they're likely to refrain from expressing them if doing so would interfere with bringing out the best in others. Because their strongest interest lies in being a catalyst of change in other people, they're likely to interact with others on their own level, in a chameleon-like manner, rather than as individuals.
Which is not to say that the ENFJ does not have opinions. ENFJs have definite values and opinions which they're able to express clearly and succinctly. These beliefs will be expressed as long as they're not too personal. ENFJ is in many ways expressive and open, but is more focused on being responsive and supportive of others. When faced with a conflict between a strongly-held value and serving another person's need, they are highly likely to value the other person's needs.
The ENFJ may feel quite lonely even when surrounded by people. This feeling of aloneness may be exacerbated by the tendency to not reveal their true selves.
People love ENFJs. They are fun to be with, and truly understand and love people. They are typically very straight-forward and honest. Usually ENFJs exude a lot of self-confidence, and have a great amount of ability to do many different things. They are generally bright, full of potential, energetic and fast-paced. They are usually good at anything which captures their interest.
ENFJs like for things to be well-organized, and will work hard at maintaining structure and resolving ambiguity. They have a tendency to be fussy, especially with their home environments.
In the work place, ENFJs do well in positions where they deal with people. They are naturals for the social committee. Their uncanny ability to understand people and say just what needs to be said to make them happy makes them naturals for counseling. They enjoy being the center of attention, and do very well in situations where they can inspire and lead others, such as teaching.
ENFJs do not like dealing with impersonal reasoning. They don't understand or appreciate its merit, and will be unhappy in situations where they're forced to deal with logic and facts without any connection to a human element. Living in the world of people possibilities, they enjoy their plans more than their achievements. They get excited about possibilities for the future, but may become easily bored and restless with the present.
ENFJs have a special gift with people, and are basically happy people when they can use that gift to help others. They get their best satisfaction from serving others. Their genuine interest in Humankind and their exceptional intuitive awareness of people makes them able to draw out even the most reserved individuals.
ENFJs have a strong need for close, intimate relationships, and will put forth a lot of effort in creating and maintaining these relationships. They're very loyal and trustworthy once involved in a relationship.
An ENFJ who has not developed their Feeling side may have difficulty making good decisions, and may rely heavily on other people in decision-making processes. If they have not developed their Intuition, they may not be able to see possibilities, and will judge things too quickly based on established value systems or social rules, without really understanding the current situation. An ENFJ who has not found their place in the world is likely to be extremely sensitive to criticism, and to have the tendency to worry excessively and feel guilty. They are also likely to be very manipulative and controling with others.
In general, ENFJs are charming, warm, gracious, creative and diverse individuals with richly developed insights into what makes other people tick. This special ability to see growth potential in others combined with a genuine drive to help people makes the ENFJ a truly valued individual. As giving and caring as the ENFJ is, they need to remember to value their own needs as well as the needs of others.
Definition 2:
Idealist Portrait of the Teacher (ENFJ)
Even more than the other Idealists, Teachers have a natural talent for leading students or trainees toward learning, or as Idealists like to think of it, they are capable of calling forth each learner's potentials. Teachers (around two percent of the population) are able - effortlessly, it seems, and almost endlessly-to dream up fascinating learning activities for their students to engage in. In some Teachers, this ability to fire the imagination can amount to a kind of genius which other types find hard to emulate. But perhaps their greatest strength lies in their belief in their students. Teachers look for the best in their students, and communicate clearly that each one has untold potential, and this confidence can inspire their students to grow and develop more than they ever thought possible.
In whatever field they choose, Teachers consider people their highest priority, and they instinctively communicate personal concern and a willingness to become involved. Warmly outgoing, and perhaps the most expressive of all the types, Teachers are remarkably good with language, especially when communicating in speech, face to face. And they do not hesitate to speak out and let their feelings be known. Bubbling with enthusiasm, Teachers will voice their passions with dramatic flourish, and can, with practice, become charismatic public speakers. This verbal ability gives Teachers a good deal of influence in groups, and they are often asked to take a leadership role.
Teachers like things settled and organized, and will schedule their work hours and social engagements well ahead of time-and they are absolutely trustworthy in honoring these commitments. Valuing as they do interpersonal cooperation and harmonious relations, Teachers are extraordinarily tolerant of others, are easy to get along with, and are usually popular wherever they are.
Teachers are highly sensitive to others, which is to say their intuition tends to be well developed. Certainly their insight into themselves and others is unparalleled. Without a doubt, they know what is going on inside themselves, and they can read other people with uncanny accuracy. Teachers also identify with others quite easily, and will actually find themselves picking up the characteristics, emotions, and beliefs of those around them. Because they slip almost unconsciously into other people's skin in this way, Teachers feel closely connected with those around them, and thus show a sincere interest in the joys and problems of their employees, colleagues, students, clients, and loved ones.
Mikhail Gorbachev, Oprah Winfrey, Pope John Paul II, Ralph Nader, John Wooden, and Margaret Mead are examples of Teacher Idealists.
Definition 3:
Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging
by Joe Butt
Profile: ENFJ
Revision: 3.0
Date of Revision: 23 Feb 2005
ENFJs are the benevolent 'pedagogues' of humanity. They have tremendous charisma by which many are drawn into their nurturant tutelage and/or grand schemes. Many ENFJs have tremendous power to manipulate others with their phenomenal interpersonal skills and unique salesmanship. But it's usually not meant as manipulation -- ENFJs generally believe in their dreams, and see themselves as helpers and enablers, which they usually are.
ENFJs are global learners. They see the big picture. The ENFJs focus is expansive. Some can juggle an amazing number of responsibilities or projects simultaneously. Many ENFJs have tremendous entrepreneurial ability.
ENFJs are, by definition, Js, with whom we associate organization and decisiveness. But they don't resemble the SJs or even the NTJs in organization of the environment nor occasional recalcitrance. ENFJs are organized in the arena of interpersonal affairs. Their offices may or may not be cluttered, but their conclusions (reached through feelings) about people and motives are drawn much more quickly and are more resilient than those of their NFP counterparts.
ENFJs know and appreciate people. Like most NFs, (and Feelers in general), they are apt to neglect themselves and their own needs for the needs of others. They have thinner psychological boundaries than most, and are at risk for being hurt or even abused by less sensitive people. ENFJs often take on more of the burdens of others than they can bear.
TRADEMARK: "The first shall be last"
This refers to the open-door policy of ENFJs. One ENFJ colleague always welcomes me into his office regardless of his own circumstances. If another person comes to the door, he allows them to interrupt our conversation with their need. While discussing that need, the phone rings and he stops to answer it. Others drop in with a 'quick question.' I finally get up, go to my office and use the call waiting feature on the telephone. When he hangs up, I have his undivided attention!
Functional Analysis:
Extraverted Feeling
Extraverted Feeling rules the ENFJ's psyche. In the sway of this rational function, these folks are predisposed to closure in matters pertaining to people, and especially on behalf of their beloved. As extraverts, their contacts are wide ranging. Face-to-face relationships are intense, personable and warm, though they may be so infrequently achieved that intimate friendships are rare.
Introverted iNtuition
Like their INFJ cousins, ENFJs are blessed through introverted intuition with clarity of perception in the inner, unconscious world. Dominant Feeling prefers to find the silver lining in even the most beggarly perceptions of those in their expanding circle of friends and, of course, in themselves. In less balanced individuals, such mitigation of the unseemly eventually undermines the ENFJ's integrity and frequently their good name. In healthier individuals, deft use of this awareness of the inner needs and desires of others enables this astute type to win friends, influence people, and avoid compromising entanglements.
The dynamic nature of their intuition moves ENFJs from one project to another with the assurance that the next one will be perfect, or much more nearly so than the last. ENFJs are continually looking for newer and better solutions to benefit their extensive family, staff, or organization.
Extraverted Sensing
Sensing is extraverted. ENFJs can manage details, particularly those necessary to implement the prevailing vision. These data have, however, a magical flexible quality. Something to be bought can be had for a song; the same something is invaluable when it's time to sell. (We are not certain, but we suspect that such is the influence of the primary function.) This wavering of sensory perception is made possible by the weaker and less mature status with which the tertiary is endowed.
Introverted Thinking
Introverted Thinking is least apparent and most enigmatic in this type. In fact, it often appears only when summoned by Feeling. At times only in jest, but in earnest if need be, Thinking entertains as logical only those conclusions which support Feeling's values. Other scenarios can be shown invalid or at best significantly inferior. Such "Thinking in the service of Feeling" has the appearance of logic, but somehow it never quite adds up.
Introverted Thinking is frequently the focus of the spiritual quest of ENFJs. David's lengthiest psalm, 119, pays it homage. "Law," "precept," "commandment," "statute:" these essences of inner thinking are the mysteries of Deity for which this great Feeler's soul searched.
Definition 4:
ENFJs are lively and enthusiastic facilitators who apply warmth and vision to helping people and meeting their needs. They are aware of people's aspirations and develop plans of action to make those aspirations into reality. They like organization and closure. They are at their best facilitating situations that require interpersonal sensitivity. ENFJs are tolerant and appreciative of others, seeking involvement with them in life's tasks. They are able communicators who are liberal in showing appreciation for others.
Living
ENFJ children want life to be friendly, harmonious, and lively. They are responsible children because they like to please others and meet their needs. In doing for others, they usually find satisfaction for themselves. They are upset by conflict or disharmony. They are pleasant, exuberant and talkative.
ENFJ teenagers are constantly on the go, participating in many, many things. They enjoy a wide variety of activities, not only for that variety but also for the action and opportunity to be with others. They love being involved with friends, clubs, and any activities that let them be with others. ENFJs are often voted most congenial or nicest person in their class. Additionally, they may serve as leaders in their school activities. As students, they are able to focus on the interpersonal spirit or nature of the school and to speak eloquently to others about the school's best values. ENFJs are likable because they notice what is good about people.
As young adults, ENFJs set goals early on, both in the personal and professional realms. They follow through diligently and usually attain what they seek. Often the goals they set have to do with making society a better place for people. ENFJs may sometimes feel pulled between financial gain and spiritual gain.
Many ENFJs take their religious and community values seriously and want others to do the same. Loyalty, commitment, and responsibility are important values to ENFJs, even as children. They often settle into organizations that have a values orientation, or they will find a spot in an organization that is centered on values or people's need. ENFJs make responsible spouses, employees, and community members. Because most ENFJs enjoy public speaking and seem to have a way with words, they are often asked to present the position of the groups to which they belong.
Some ENFJs report that at mid-life they seek situations for themselves where it is possible for them to turn inward. This often takes a structured form such as meditation, journaling, or in some cases even career changes.
In retirement, they are likely to want to settle geographically in an area where they have close personal relationships and/or close personal ties to a specific organization. The relationships and values that are important to the ENFJ become even more so in their retirement. Many ENFJs participate in voluntary service work in retirement.
Learning
ENFJs learn best in structured situations in which they are able to talk bout the lesson and interact with their peers. Because they want their teachers to be pleased with them, they attempt to be model students. They are willing to do what is required in order to become personally recognized by their teachers. Because they take criticism personally, they can either be wounded by it or be willing to redouble their efforts in order to change the criticism. ENFJs enjoy classes that have subject matter relating to people, their needs, their aspirations, and their characterizations. Many ENFJs choose the liberal arts because it gives them an opportunity to more fully explore humanity.
ENFJs are good students when the subject matter relates to their strong relationship values and people orientation, and when the teacher is warm and personal. They apply the necessary effort and energy to complete the tasks that they start. ENFJs also like some independent learning and projects.
Working
ENFJs focused on the organization's ideals and operate within those ideals. They focus on how organizations should treat people and communicate these values to others. They enjoy leading and facilitating teams, and like to bring matters to mutually beneficial conclusions.
ENFJs prefer a work setting that contains individuals focused on changing things for the betterment of others. They like an environment that is people oriented, supportive, and organized. They do their best when there is a spirit of harmony, with encouragement given for self-expression. And they like their work to be settled and orderly, but not so much so that it is dull, quiet, unchanging, or unchallenging.
The ENFJ organizing style is to plan around the particular value or ideal and to supply the necessary energy toward its achievement or implementation. In the accomplishment of the goal, ENFJs will look at the people available and will assign tasks based on who needs the experience, the exposure, or the development. To a lesser degree, they will assign the task based on who needs the experience, the exposure, or the development. To a lesser degree, they will assign the task based purely on competency, because ENFJs feel it is more important to help others grow and develop new skills. If others have a particular deadline that needs to be met, the ENFJ will work to meet that deadline so that the other person will be happy.
ENFJs prefer occupations that reflect their ideals and that promote harmonious relationships with others. They tend to be attracted to occupation with a service orientation. They generally follow policies and procedures as long as those procedures are compatible with people's needs. They prefer things to be organized and decided rather than haphazard.
Leading
The ENFJ puts relationships and responsibilities before personal leisure. Their time can be imposed upon easily; however, they need to guard against excessive responsiveness to avoid reaching overload.
They particularly enjoy reading novels and seeing movies in order to see how the characters play out the life issues and questions presented in the story; it gives them an opportunity to see how others live and get along. They enjoy discussing their reading and may join book groups in order to do that. They like going to movies and plays with others and like to comment on the plot characterization. They are close observers of others' behavior.
Many ENFJs join religious or community-oriented groups whose focus is to work for better understanding between people. ENFJs like discussion and an opportunity to talk about values and philosophical topics. Many do not like activities in which there is a great deal of competition or in which someone or something could be hurt.
Loving
For the ENFJ, love means flowers, poetry, candlelight dinners --- in other words, romance with a capital R. When they first fall in love, they fall in love with an ideal perspective of what the relationship will be, and they fall deeply, head over heels. ENFJs value commitment and loyalty, and look for it from their partner. They typically enjoy activities with their partners that allow them to discuss the relationship and focus on what each person truly believes. When commitments are broken, ENFJs become upset because they see the breakup as a personal reflection on them and because they have idealized the relationship. Since they are willing to put the time and effort into the relationship, they expect it will continue on as it was from the very start. Relationships have their ups and downs; the downs, however, are particularly hard on the ENFJ, who does not manage disharmony well.
When scorned, ENFJs may be resentful, spiteful, and deeply hurt. Because they are acutely aware of emotional matters they take the breakup of a relationship especially hard. They are willing to discuss the ending of the relationship with only a few others because they feel a sense of blame and shame for the relationship not working out.
AND THE LAST ONE!
ENFJ's are outstanding leaders of groups, both task groups and growth groups. They have the charming characteristic of seeming to take for granted that they will be followed, never doubting that people will want to do what they suggest. And, more often than not, people do, because this type has unusual charisma. ENFJ's place a high value on cooperation from others and are most willing to cooperate themselves.
Found in only 5 percent of the general population, ENFJ's place people as being of highest importance and priority. As a result, ENFJ's may find themselves feeling responsible for the feelings of others to an extent which places a burden on the relationship. An ENFJ communicates caring, concern, and a willingness to become involved. Thus people turn to ENFJ's for nurture and support, which an ENFJ is usually able to deliver. At times, however, these kinds of demands can overwhelm ENFJ's, who find at this point that they lack the skills to dissociate. ENFJ's do not seem able to turn away from these demands even when they become unreasonable. Or, if forced to let go of the burden through sheer unavailability of time or energy, ENFJ's experience a guilt all out of proportion to the realities of the commitment made to the relationship.
ENFJ's are especially vulnerable to idealizing interpersonal relationships, raising these relationships to a plane which seldom can sustain the realities of human nature. Because of this tendency to raise interpersonal relations to the ideal, ENFJ's may unwittingly overpower their friends, who believe that they cannot possibly live up to an ENFJ's perception of them. The fact is, ENFJ's are extraordinarily tolerant of others, seldom critical, and always trustworthy.
ENFJ's take communication for granted and believe that they are understood and that their communications are accepted. Just as they themselves are accepting, so do they assume that others are the same. When ENFJ's find that their position or beliefs were not comprehended or accepted, they are surprised, puzzled, and sometimes hurt. Fortunately, this does not happen with high frequency, as ENFJ's have a remarkable fluency with language, especially in speech; they are particularly adept when communicating face-to-face as opposed to communicating in writing. They are influential, therefore, in groups, having no hesitation about speaking out, no matter how large or small the group may be.
ENFJ's have an unusual ability to relate to others with empathy, taking into themselves the characteristics, emotions, and beliefs of others. This can pose a danger for ENFJ's because they can unconsciously over-identify with others and pick up their burdens as if they were their own. In the process, ENFJ's may risk their own sense of identity. They have a natural ability to mimic because of this highly developed ability to empathize by introjection. They are likely to be very concerned about the problems of those close to them, but they also may get as deeply involved in the problems of those not so close and may find themselves over-extended emotionally.
ENFJ's would do well to follow their hunches, for their intuition tends to be well developed. Decisions made purely on the basis of logic may not be so sound, and checking with a person who has a strong T preference might be at times advisable for the ENFJ. In the framework of values, however, the ENFJ is on certain ground. Generally, they know what they prefer and can read other people with outstanding accuracy. Seldom is an ENFJ wrong about the motivations or intent of another, hidden or not.
Career
This longing for the perfect carries over into the careers of ENFJ's, who experience some degree of restlessness whatever their jobs. And, as with ENFP's, ENFJ's have a wide range of occupations which offer success. Being verbally adept, ENFJ's contribute to an unusual level when dealing with people, particularly face-to-face; the media, the ministry, and the stage and screen are populated with successful ENFJ's. They make superior therapists, charismatic teachers, excellent executives, and personalized salespersons. Areas that would not permit utilization of the interactional talents of ENFJ's for example, accounting, should be avoided; otherwise, almost any people-to-people occupation where personal, sustained contact is involved capitalizes on the personality of an ENFJ.
ENFJ'S like to have things settled and organized. They prefer to plan both work and social engagements ahead and tend to be absolutely reliable in honoring these commitments. ENFJ's are very much at home in complex situations which require the juggling of much data. At the same time, they can handle people with charm and concern. ENFJ's are usually popular wherever they are. Their ability to be comfortable either leading or following makes them easy to have around, whatever the situation. A well-developed ENFJ group leader can provide, almost endlessly, activities for groups to engage in with almost no preplanning and can find adequate roles for members of the group to play. In some, this can amount to genius which other types find hard to emulate. In this ability to organize without planning there is a certain similarity to an ESFJ, but the latter acts more as a master of ceremonies than as a leader of groups. The ESFJ is more of a recreational leader, who insures that each member has fun at a party and that the right things are expressed at social occasions, especially institutional social occasions such as weddings, funerals parties, and the like. ENFJ's, just like the ESFJ's, value harmonious human relations above all else; but ENFJ's are not so easily crushed by indifference as are ESFJ's and are more independent of other's valuations.
Home
ENFJ's are socially adept and make excellent companions and mates. They also are deeply devoted to their children, yet tend not to be domineering to either the children or mate. In fact, the ENFJ is so even-tempered that he or she can be victimized by a mate who might have become more and more demanding.
ENFJ mates always try to please and feel personally responsible when home life does not go smoothly. They are tireless in their efforts to see that it does, providing generously from available income, time, and energy. This dedication often exists, however, side by side with an ENFJ's dream of the perfect relationship-a characteristic of all NF's, but one which is particularly strong in an ENFJ. Thus an ENFJ has that longing for the ideal that results in a vague dissatisfaction with whatever is in the way of relationships, mating as well as friendships.
Mates
Who can complement this growth-catalyst? The opposite on the S side is ISTP, the "artisan." It is not difficult to see how the teacher inherent in the ENFJ would want to "bring out" the craftsman in the ISTP. The artisan, however, has another side to his nature that pops up occasionally and in some cases is a life theme: adventure and exploration. The ISTP can, so to speak, be wayward, take off for parts unknown. It is difficult to imagine a similar desire on the part of the ENFJ to bring out adventuresomeness.
The ENFJ, on the intuitive side, finds the INTP attractive. Now here is a splendid target for our catalyst, for beneath the cool, collected, detached, and doubting exterior lies an architect of buildings, machines, tools, operations, tactics, languages, mathematics, or whatever can be designed. If, that is, this latently capable designer can be "activated" or "brought out".
Def 5:
ENFJs direct their energy towards the outer world of actions and spoken words. They try to build harmony in important personal relationships. Their lives are organised on a personal basis, seeking to develop and promote personal growth in people they value.
What Makes An ENFJ Tick?
The Dominant function is the judging one of Feeling. Characteristics associated with this function include:
Makes decisions on the basis of personal values
Is appreciative and accepting of people - enjoying company and seeking harmony
Assesses the impact of decisions on others, being sympathetic or compassionate
Takes a personal approach
The judging Feeling function is extraverted. That is, Feeling is used primarily to govern the outer world of actions and spoken words. The ENFJ will therefore:
seek stable, harmonious relationships
tend to adapt to the environment, taking on board those values that are held as important by friends and family, or society as a whole
express the appreciation that is felt towards others
tend to consider others' feelings before his/her own
be sensitive to praise and criticism, and seek to conform to others' reasonable expectations
The Feeling function is primarily supported by introverted iNtuitive perception, That is, iNtuitive perception is used primarily to manage the inner world of thoughts and emotions. This will modify the way that the Feeling is directed, by:
focusing the (outer world) Feeling on ideas and possibilities for people
looking for meaningful relationships
aiming to understand people, gaining insight into their personality and motivation
The classic temperament of an ENFJ is Apollonian, or Choleric, for whom a basic driving force is the search for meaning or purpose.
Contributions To The Team Of An ENFJ
In a team environment, the ENFJ can contribute by:
promoting insight and common understanding amongst the team
facilitating discussions, encouraging contributions from all team members by asking questions in a structured way
seeking to arrive at consensus decisions
generating team spirit though the ENFJ's own energy and enthusiasm
focusing on areas of agreement and building on others' proposals
bringing discussions to positive conclusions
The potential ways in which an ENFJ can irritate others include:
talking too much
assuming they know the needs of others - in trying to help them develop insight, the ENFJ can appear bossy
avoiding conflict and not giving criticism when it is needed
taking criticism personally
focusing so much on interpersonal issues that cost and other impersonal considerations are not adequately addressed.
Personal Growth
As with all types, the ENFJ can achieve personal growth by developing all functions that are not fully developed, through actions such as:
learning to observe and accept the negative aspects of those people they admire
finding an independent and objective means of verifying their insights about people
pausing and thinking, encouraging others to articulate their own needs, and using active listening to verify understanding
undertaking a critical appraisal of a situation or person, and expressing disagreement or criticism when it could be of value to the recipient
focusing on impersonal details when making decisions
listing options and undertaking a formal process of evaluation against criteria, including a cost benefit analysis
establishing a long term goal, working towards it, but being prepared to modify it in the light of experience and developing circumstances
letting others develop at their own pace
Recognizing Stress
As stress increases, 'learned behaviour' tends to give way to the natural style, so the ENFJ will behave more according to type when under greater stress. For example, in a crisis, the ENFJ might:
get everyone organised
express appreciation for their efforts
contribute creative ideas, but overlook current realities
fail to consider the cost implications
Under extreme stress, fatigue or illness, the ENFJ's shadow may appear - a negative form of ISTP.
Example characteristics are:
being very critical and find fault with almost everything
doing things to excess - e.g.: eating, drinking or exercising
asking for irrelevant information
ignoring others' feelings
The shadow is part of the unconscious that is often visible to others, onto whom the shadow is projected. The ENFJ may therefore readily see these faults in others without recognising it in him/her self.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
3.12.09 health update
Thursday, March 12, 2009 7:58 AM
basic results from monday
very high EKG
low white blood cells
abnormal formation of cells... (apparently they resembled mono-like cells)
so i'm highly allergic to something... low white cells - why i cant fight infection well... and idk about the formation of the cells. in the hospital they told me i was anemic- and this test says im not. i'm so tired of getting test just to find out they are contradictory or theres something different they discover with every test
thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers. yesterday and this mornin are the first time i've been super negative, i really hardly get mad and i dont know why i am- but i'm just so over that i've wasted 6 wks of my life being sick. and granted i haven't always been the most healthy individual- especially when it came to college- but i can't even begin to explain how physically awful i feel, how weak i am, etc etc - i just really hate this .
but again, thank you all for letting me rant, your thoughts, prayers, and kind words. i really have some amazing people in my life and i know how blessed i am. which is why i get so pissed for gettting mad ab this.
i dont know- i may go in hiding until i calm down.
love you alll.
thanks for checking in on me
kab
basic results from monday
very high EKG
low white blood cells
abnormal formation of cells... (apparently they resembled mono-like cells)
so i'm highly allergic to something... low white cells - why i cant fight infection well... and idk about the formation of the cells. in the hospital they told me i was anemic- and this test says im not. i'm so tired of getting test just to find out they are contradictory or theres something different they discover with every test
thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers. yesterday and this mornin are the first time i've been super negative, i really hardly get mad and i dont know why i am- but i'm just so over that i've wasted 6 wks of my life being sick. and granted i haven't always been the most healthy individual- especially when it came to college- but i can't even begin to explain how physically awful i feel, how weak i am, etc etc - i just really hate this .
but again, thank you all for letting me rant, your thoughts, prayers, and kind words. i really have some amazing people in my life and i know how blessed i am. which is why i get so pissed for gettting mad ab this.
i dont know- i may go in hiding until i calm down.
love you alll.
thanks for checking in on me
kab
3.10.09 health update
Tuesday, March 10, 2009 11:11 PM
my damn computer closed out the page and i lost all the information i had written. so this will be a brief summary.
my body had an adverse reaction to the treatment i've been undergoing the last 6 wks. my dr. is very concerned - i mean like worried concerned- bc there has to be something really wrong for the treatment to do so much damage. basically- as far as fixin everything we've known that was wrong- there is nothing medically they can do anymore bc my body is rejecting all treatment.. so i just have to take a multivitamin everyday bc everything else is just making things worse-
so my mrsa is still active- but there is nothing we can try anymore but to let it run its course.
also, as my dr. was feeling my lymph nodes and my throat and everything - i was bitching and bitching and i said "fischer- idk wtf is wrong with me- but something serious is- this isnt the mrsa shit this is something really wrong- i feel like im constantly being weighed down by something extremely heavy- I have a weight on my chest that makes it hard it breath- (etc etc) and that's not normal" and he looked like just different than ever (i've gone to him for 22 years) - and he said "you're right kel, something is really wrong".... my spleen and all those things are inflamed- or whatever its called when they aren't working properly.
they took my blood bc they pretty much said at best i am severely anemic. however, there are a lot of other options- that are to say the least- unwanted. they are fairly certain my blood count is incredibly abnormal (too high/low red/white cells). Even the lab tech (who has been there as long as I've been going) started crying with me when she drew my blood. My doctors office is like family- actually my aunt works there so I guess it really is?
Anyway, I find out more tomorrow- and i'm going to submit this before i accidentally erase this one too. more details to come- but the only good news is i will probably feel better soon- its just i wont be better for a while.
Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. It has been the most surreal unpleasant time of my life (and as a lot of you know I've had my share of ups and downs with health and other trials for sure)
Also, a big thank you to Kim Claire Lynch because today she is the only person that could get me to stop crying- I literally cried all day until I talked to her at like 11pm. We were both crying and then before I knew it we were laughing for an hour and a half. Love you KC... And of course thanks to sissa- who would literally try to kill MRSA if it was a person :) Okay and last two ppl in this note- Paul for coming to see my apt finally- and Luke for being the most intense listener I have ever seen haha
love you all
thanks for reading.
KAB
my damn computer closed out the page and i lost all the information i had written. so this will be a brief summary.
my body had an adverse reaction to the treatment i've been undergoing the last 6 wks. my dr. is very concerned - i mean like worried concerned- bc there has to be something really wrong for the treatment to do so much damage. basically- as far as fixin everything we've known that was wrong- there is nothing medically they can do anymore bc my body is rejecting all treatment.. so i just have to take a multivitamin everyday bc everything else is just making things worse-
so my mrsa is still active- but there is nothing we can try anymore but to let it run its course.
also, as my dr. was feeling my lymph nodes and my throat and everything - i was bitching and bitching and i said "fischer- idk wtf is wrong with me- but something serious is- this isnt the mrsa shit this is something really wrong- i feel like im constantly being weighed down by something extremely heavy- I have a weight on my chest that makes it hard it breath- (etc etc) and that's not normal" and he looked like just different than ever (i've gone to him for 22 years) - and he said "you're right kel, something is really wrong".... my spleen and all those things are inflamed- or whatever its called when they aren't working properly.
they took my blood bc they pretty much said at best i am severely anemic. however, there are a lot of other options- that are to say the least- unwanted. they are fairly certain my blood count is incredibly abnormal (too high/low red/white cells). Even the lab tech (who has been there as long as I've been going) started crying with me when she drew my blood. My doctors office is like family- actually my aunt works there so I guess it really is?
Anyway, I find out more tomorrow- and i'm going to submit this before i accidentally erase this one too. more details to come- but the only good news is i will probably feel better soon- its just i wont be better for a while.
Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. It has been the most surreal unpleasant time of my life (and as a lot of you know I've had my share of ups and downs with health and other trials for sure)
Also, a big thank you to Kim Claire Lynch because today she is the only person that could get me to stop crying- I literally cried all day until I talked to her at like 11pm. We were both crying and then before I knew it we were laughing for an hour and a half. Love you KC... And of course thanks to sissa- who would literally try to kill MRSA if it was a person :) Okay and last two ppl in this note- Paul for coming to see my apt finally- and Luke for being the most intense listener I have ever seen haha
love you all
thanks for reading.
KAB
Should I post MRSA pictures?
Wednesday, February 25, 2009 2:51 AM
I know yall must be so sick of me talking about MRSA- and I had planned on dropping it and trying to live my life again- its almost impossible- and not many people love their work more than I do. I even love getting super anally organized for school on the daily! Still super positive - and I am sure in my heart of hearts I won't die- I'm far too positive to go out in such a miserable way... so I'm glad for that to be able to spend more time all of you loves of my life :)
But I'd like yalls opinion - for my own curiosity, to see yalls, and follow the advice of an intelligent and most well-meaning mom I've ever met to maybe even spreading awareness of what to look for... Because CA-MRSA is spreading at a much more rapid speed ... God bless everyone who has had this awful illness- especially those in the health care field that are potentionally, if not already, loosing their jobs due to contracting this while performing their jobs.
CA-MRSA you can get simply from locker rooms, gyms, weaken immune system, lake-esc water, (yep before this month didnt spend much time in the ER and DEFINATLY not in the gym... makes sense how I could have gotten it--- no no no no no not saying just bc of all the flith I had to encounter during my years of lifeguarding/ managing, supervising lifeguards)- but I'm a lake junkie. And water and an open wound- also recipe for danger - eek
Seriously the pictures are really cool- in my opinion and so is everyone at work's opinion, my family's and stavinoha's (or they were all really good liars) In the hospital I thought it was almost as weird/ cool as I did from my transport to the hospital to the day the dr. who started/ opened the hospital and just wanted to check on my case daily couldn't get over the fact I had a normal looking appearence after 3 whole days. (i'd say meag thought the pictures were cool but i'm pretty sure she hated it),
found a good article on it- read if you want- if you don't i get it. i'll tell you what, it is so incredibly hard to constatntly feel like shit.
I told sissa not to post pictures of this past month for fear of being single the rest of my life... but * A GOOD LONG TIME FRIEND OF MINE* made a suggestion that since most people dont know what MRSA can look like- and I was a rough explample maybe it could help someone identify something before it gets too late. I was already really familiar with the infection so I knew exactly what was going on - took off of work at noon, got into the first dr. appt I could (4pm) stayed and chit-chatted with them (ones my aunt, the rest I have known for 22 yrs)- sure enough I wake up at 5am roughly 12 hours after I left the doctor looking like a quasi-disaster.. .def worse than I had ever seen at that time, but within 12 hours I had a damn grapefruit stuffed in one cheek and a lemon attached to my head.
The stats on MRSA are are a tad contradictory at times, but mostly go along this lines:
*25% of Americans get a STAPH infection yearly- a good part of them don't even know it (and thank God for that right now I ask you that!)
*Out of those 25% ish less than 1 % get MRSA
*Out of the less than 1%, 20,000 Americans die.
Now I wasn't reading wikipedia - in fact I've been reading up on all this as much as possible and thats the general, if not redundant, information thrown my way.I've read so much literature, I apologize if I accidently got some of the information wrong- please correct me.
Thanks again for coming over to my post :)
MRSA
Definition
Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus (MRSA) is a bacterial infection that is highly resistant to some antibiotics.
Alternative Names
Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus; Community-acquired MRSA (CA-MRSA); Hospital-acquired MRSA (HA-MRSA)
Causes
MRSA is caused by a strain of Staphylococcus aureus (S. aureus) bacteria. S. aureus is a common type of bacteria that normally lives on the skin and sometimes in the nasal passages. MRSA refers to S. aureus strains that do not respond to the antibiotics normally used to cure staph infections.
The bacteria can cause infection when they enter the body through a cut, sore, catheter, or breathing tube. The infection can be minor and local (for example, a pimple), or more serious (involving the heart, blood, or bone).
Serious staph infections are more common in people with weak immune systems. This includes patients in hospitals and long-term care facilities and those receiving kidney dialysis.
MRSA infections are grouped into two types:
* Healthcare-associated MRSA (HA-MRSA) infections occur in people who are or have recently been in the hospital. Those who have been hospitalized or had surgery within the past year are at increased risk. MRSA bacteria are responsible for a large percentage of hospital-acquired staph infections.
* Community-associated MRSA (CA-MRSA) infections are ones that occur in otherwise healthy people who have not recently been in the hospital. The infections have occurred among athletes who share equipment or personal items (such as towels or razors) and children in daycare facilities. Members of the military and those who get tattoos are also at risk. The number of CA-MRSA cases is increasing.
Symptoms
Staph skin infections cause a red, swollen, and painful area on the skin. Other symptoms may include:
* Drainage of pus or other fluids from the site
* Fever
* Skin abscess
* Warmth around the infected area
Symptoms of a more serious staph infection may include:
* Chest pain
* Chills
* Fatigue
* Fever
* General ill feeling (malaise)
* Headache
* Muscle aches
* Rash
* Shortness of breath
Exams and Tests
Depending on your symptoms, your doctor may recommend the following tests to detect and confirm the bacteria causing the infection:
* Blood culture
* Culture of the drainage (fluid) from the infection
* Skin culture from the infected site
* Sputum culture
* Urine culture
Treatment
Draining the skin sore is often the only treatment needed for a local skin MRSA infection. This can be done at the doctor's office.
More serious MRSA infections, especially HA-MRSA infections, are becoming increasingly difficult to treat. Antibiotics that may still work include:
* Clindamycin *DONE IT ETHER IV OR AT HOME- FIRST WEEKS WERE ROUGHER IF IN HOSPITAL I
HAD 10 IVS OF THIS AS WELLL*
* Linezolid (Zyvox)
MAYBE THE THIRD SET OF 10 IVS OF ANTIBOTICS
* Tetracycline (doxycycline) *MEDS IM ON NOW- DR. SAID ITS COMPARABLE TO A KID ON ACNE
WHERE THEY APPARENTLY HAVE TO TAKE A MEDICINE FOR A FEW MONTHS UNTIL IT GOES
AWAY? WE'RE TRYING TO KILL THE INFECTION AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE*
* Trimethoprim-sulfamethoxazole (Bactrim, Bactrim DS, Septra, Septra DS)
*ON PRE HOSPTIAL STAY*
* Vancomycin (Vancocin, Vancoled)
i THINK THIS WAS ONE OF THE ONES THROUGH MY IV, SO 10 IVS OF THESE
It is important to finish all doses of antibiotics you have been given, even if you feel better before the final dose. Unfinished doses can lead to further drug resistance in the bacteria, or can cause an infection that seemed to be cured to return.
Other treatments may be needed for more serious infections. The person will be admitted to a hospital. Treatment may involve:
* Fluids and medications given through a vein
* Kidney dialysis (if kidney failure occurs)
* Oxygen
Support Groups
For more information about MRSA, see the Centers for Disease Control web site: www.cdc.gov.
Outlook (Prognosis)
How well a person does depends on the severity of the infection and their overall health. MRSA-related pneumonia and blood poisoning are associated with high death rates.
Possible Complications
Serious staph infections may lead to:
* Blood poisoning (sepsis)
* Cellulitis
* Infection of the heart valves (endocarditis)
* Pneumonia
* Toxic shock syndrome
Organ failure and death may result from untreated MRSA infections.
When to Contact a Medical Professional
Call your health care provider if:
* A wound seems to get worse rather than heal
* You have any other symptoms of staph infection
Prevention
Careful attention to personal hygiene is key to avoiding MRSA infections.
* Wash your hands frequently, especially if visiting someone in a hospital or long-term care facility.
* Make sure all doctors, nurses, and other health care providers wash their hands before examining you.
* Do not share personal items such as towels or razors with another person -- MRSA can be transmitted through contaminated items.
* Cover all wounds with a clean bandage, and avoid contact with other people's soiled bandages.
* If you share sporting equipment, clean it first with antiseptic solution.
* Avoid common whirlpools or saunas if another participant has an open sore.
* Make sure that shared bathing facilities are clean.
Siegel JD, Rhinehart E, Jackson M, Chiarello L; Healthcare Infection Control Practices Advisory Committee. Management of multi-drug resistant organisms in healthcare settings, 2006. US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Accessed January 25, 2008.
Nicolle L. Community-acquired MRSA: a practitioner's guide. CMAJ. 2006;175:145.
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Epidemiology and management of MRSA in the Community. October 26, 2007. Accessed January 25, 2008.
Review Date: 9/28/2008
Reviewed By: David C. Dugdale, III, MD, Professor of Medicine, Division of General Medicine, Department of Medicine, University of Washington School of Medicine; and Jatin M. Vyas, PhD, MD, Instructor in Medicine, Harvard Medical School, Assistant in Medicine, Division of Infectious Disease, Massachusetts General Hospital. Also reviewed by David Zieve, MD, MHA, Medical Director, A.D.A.M., Inc.
The information provided herein should not be used during any medical emergency or for the diagnosis or treatment of any medical condition. A licensed physician should be consulted for diagnosis and treatment of any and all medical conditions. Call 911 for all medical emergencies. Links to other sites are provided for information only -- they do not constitute endorsements of those other sites. Copyright 2009A.D.A.M., Inc.
I know yall must be so sick of me talking about MRSA- and I had planned on dropping it and trying to live my life again- its almost impossible- and not many people love their work more than I do. I even love getting super anally organized for school on the daily! Still super positive - and I am sure in my heart of hearts I won't die- I'm far too positive to go out in such a miserable way... so I'm glad for that to be able to spend more time all of you loves of my life :)
But I'd like yalls opinion - for my own curiosity, to see yalls, and follow the advice of an intelligent and most well-meaning mom I've ever met to maybe even spreading awareness of what to look for... Because CA-MRSA is spreading at a much more rapid speed ... God bless everyone who has had this awful illness- especially those in the health care field that are potentionally, if not already, loosing their jobs due to contracting this while performing their jobs.
CA-MRSA you can get simply from locker rooms, gyms, weaken immune system, lake-esc water, (yep before this month didnt spend much time in the ER and DEFINATLY not in the gym... makes sense how I could have gotten it--- no no no no no not saying just bc of all the flith I had to encounter during my years of lifeguarding/ managing, supervising lifeguards)- but I'm a lake junkie. And water and an open wound- also recipe for danger - eek
Seriously the pictures are really cool- in my opinion and so is everyone at work's opinion, my family's and stavinoha's (or they were all really good liars) In the hospital I thought it was almost as weird/ cool as I did from my transport to the hospital to the day the dr. who started/ opened the hospital and just wanted to check on my case daily couldn't get over the fact I had a normal looking appearence after 3 whole days. (i'd say meag thought the pictures were cool but i'm pretty sure she hated it),
found a good article on it- read if you want- if you don't i get it. i'll tell you what, it is so incredibly hard to constatntly feel like shit.
I told sissa not to post pictures of this past month for fear of being single the rest of my life... but * A GOOD LONG TIME FRIEND OF MINE* made a suggestion that since most people dont know what MRSA can look like- and I was a rough explample maybe it could help someone identify something before it gets too late. I was already really familiar with the infection so I knew exactly what was going on - took off of work at noon, got into the first dr. appt I could (4pm) stayed and chit-chatted with them (ones my aunt, the rest I have known for 22 yrs)- sure enough I wake up at 5am roughly 12 hours after I left the doctor looking like a quasi-disaster.. .def worse than I had ever seen at that time, but within 12 hours I had a damn grapefruit stuffed in one cheek and a lemon attached to my head.
The stats on MRSA are are a tad contradictory at times, but mostly go along this lines:
*25% of Americans get a STAPH infection yearly- a good part of them don't even know it (and thank God for that right now I ask you that!)
*Out of those 25% ish less than 1 % get MRSA
*Out of the less than 1%, 20,000 Americans die.
Now I wasn't reading wikipedia - in fact I've been reading up on all this as much as possible and thats the general, if not redundant, information thrown my way.I've read so much literature, I apologize if I accidently got some of the information wrong- please correct me.
Thanks again for coming over to my post :)
MRSA
Definition
Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus (MRSA) is a bacterial infection that is highly resistant to some antibiotics.
Alternative Names
Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus; Community-acquired MRSA (CA-MRSA); Hospital-acquired MRSA (HA-MRSA)
Causes
MRSA is caused by a strain of Staphylococcus aureus (S. aureus) bacteria. S. aureus is a common type of bacteria that normally lives on the skin and sometimes in the nasal passages. MRSA refers to S. aureus strains that do not respond to the antibiotics normally used to cure staph infections.
The bacteria can cause infection when they enter the body through a cut, sore, catheter, or breathing tube. The infection can be minor and local (for example, a pimple), or more serious (involving the heart, blood, or bone).
Serious staph infections are more common in people with weak immune systems. This includes patients in hospitals and long-term care facilities and those receiving kidney dialysis.
MRSA infections are grouped into two types:
* Healthcare-associated MRSA (HA-MRSA) infections occur in people who are or have recently been in the hospital. Those who have been hospitalized or had surgery within the past year are at increased risk. MRSA bacteria are responsible for a large percentage of hospital-acquired staph infections.
* Community-associated MRSA (CA-MRSA) infections are ones that occur in otherwise healthy people who have not recently been in the hospital. The infections have occurred among athletes who share equipment or personal items (such as towels or razors) and children in daycare facilities. Members of the military and those who get tattoos are also at risk. The number of CA-MRSA cases is increasing.
Symptoms
Staph skin infections cause a red, swollen, and painful area on the skin. Other symptoms may include:
* Drainage of pus or other fluids from the site
* Fever
* Skin abscess
* Warmth around the infected area
Symptoms of a more serious staph infection may include:
* Chest pain
* Chills
* Fatigue
* Fever
* General ill feeling (malaise)
* Headache
* Muscle aches
* Rash
* Shortness of breath
Exams and Tests
Depending on your symptoms, your doctor may recommend the following tests to detect and confirm the bacteria causing the infection:
* Blood culture
* Culture of the drainage (fluid) from the infection
* Skin culture from the infected site
* Sputum culture
* Urine culture
Treatment
Draining the skin sore is often the only treatment needed for a local skin MRSA infection. This can be done at the doctor's office.
More serious MRSA infections, especially HA-MRSA infections, are becoming increasingly difficult to treat. Antibiotics that may still work include:
* Clindamycin *DONE IT ETHER IV OR AT HOME- FIRST WEEKS WERE ROUGHER IF IN HOSPITAL I
HAD 10 IVS OF THIS AS WELLL*
* Linezolid (Zyvox)
MAYBE THE THIRD SET OF 10 IVS OF ANTIBOTICS
* Tetracycline (doxycycline) *MEDS IM ON NOW- DR. SAID ITS COMPARABLE TO A KID ON ACNE
WHERE THEY APPARENTLY HAVE TO TAKE A MEDICINE FOR A FEW MONTHS UNTIL IT GOES
AWAY? WE'RE TRYING TO KILL THE INFECTION AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE*
* Trimethoprim-sulfamethoxazole (Bactrim, Bactrim DS, Septra, Septra DS)
*ON PRE HOSPTIAL STAY*
* Vancomycin (Vancocin, Vancoled)
i THINK THIS WAS ONE OF THE ONES THROUGH MY IV, SO 10 IVS OF THESE
It is important to finish all doses of antibiotics you have been given, even if you feel better before the final dose. Unfinished doses can lead to further drug resistance in the bacteria, or can cause an infection that seemed to be cured to return.
Other treatments may be needed for more serious infections. The person will be admitted to a hospital. Treatment may involve:
* Fluids and medications given through a vein
* Kidney dialysis (if kidney failure occurs)
* Oxygen
Support Groups
For more information about MRSA, see the Centers for Disease Control web site: www.cdc.gov.
Outlook (Prognosis)
How well a person does depends on the severity of the infection and their overall health. MRSA-related pneumonia and blood poisoning are associated with high death rates.
Possible Complications
Serious staph infections may lead to:
* Blood poisoning (sepsis)
* Cellulitis
* Infection of the heart valves (endocarditis)
* Pneumonia
* Toxic shock syndrome
Organ failure and death may result from untreated MRSA infections.
When to Contact a Medical Professional
Call your health care provider if:
* A wound seems to get worse rather than heal
* You have any other symptoms of staph infection
Prevention
Careful attention to personal hygiene is key to avoiding MRSA infections.
* Wash your hands frequently, especially if visiting someone in a hospital or long-term care facility.
* Make sure all doctors, nurses, and other health care providers wash their hands before examining you.
* Do not share personal items such as towels or razors with another person -- MRSA can be transmitted through contaminated items.
* Cover all wounds with a clean bandage, and avoid contact with other people's soiled bandages.
* If you share sporting equipment, clean it first with antiseptic solution.
* Avoid common whirlpools or saunas if another participant has an open sore.
* Make sure that shared bathing facilities are clean.
Siegel JD, Rhinehart E, Jackson M, Chiarello L; Healthcare Infection Control Practices Advisory Committee. Management of multi-drug resistant organisms in healthcare settings, 2006. US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Accessed January 25, 2008.
Nicolle L. Community-acquired MRSA: a practitioner's guide. CMAJ. 2006;175:145.
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Epidemiology and management of MRSA in the Community. October 26, 2007. Accessed January 25, 2008.
Review Date: 9/28/2008
Reviewed By: David C. Dugdale, III, MD, Professor of Medicine, Division of General Medicine, Department of Medicine, University of Washington School of Medicine; and Jatin M. Vyas, PhD, MD, Instructor in Medicine, Harvard Medical School, Assistant in Medicine, Division of Infectious Disease, Massachusetts General Hospital. Also reviewed by David Zieve, MD, MHA, Medical Director, A.D.A.M., Inc.
The information provided herein should not be used during any medical emergency or for the diagnosis or treatment of any medical condition. A licensed physician should be consulted for diagnosis and treatment of any and all medical conditions. Call 911 for all medical emergencies. Links to other sites are provided for information only -- they do not constitute endorsements of those other sites. Copyright 2009A.D.A.M., Inc.
Taylor's description of MRSA
Friday, February 13, 2009 12:59 AM
Taylor Laney is one of the most intelligent persons I have ever known.She's in med school and has a great deal of knowledge about MRSA so I've been talking to her via facebook ab MRSA and just different symptoms and everything I've been experiencing. She's put what I've been going through in real peoples terms. So I'm going to post some of her response to my ongoing badgering of her insight on all of this bc idk how else to explain it:
that sucks about your professors. they obviously have been living under a rock for the past 20 yrs to not know how bad that is. it is bad when it's a skin infection and when it spreads and gets in your blood stream it is SO bad. I couldnt believe that at all. It is such a bad bacteria that when it is as severe as what you had, your body is doing everything it can do fight off the infection and in the mean time, you get weak, sick, are in a lot of pain, etc. Infections that bad basically just run your body into the ground. Was Vancomycin the antibiotic they were giving you? I am so glad you are okay, I for sure understand how bad that is. Most people dont realize that MRSA is a bacteria that is pretty much resistant to everything and once it gets in your blood you have no choice but to go to the hospital and get on IV antibiotics.
I'm sure ill post more bc I swear even when I research it, Taylor has helped me make sense of how it is possible for me to simply drive to my apt from my parents (30 min drive), pick up my dry cleaning, check my mail- and it wears me out so much I was so worn out and weak I slept for 25 hrs straight.
Huge thank u to taylor and everyone else who is still checking up on me.
Love u all
Taylor Laney is one of the most intelligent persons I have ever known.She's in med school and has a great deal of knowledge about MRSA so I've been talking to her via facebook ab MRSA and just different symptoms and everything I've been experiencing. She's put what I've been going through in real peoples terms. So I'm going to post some of her response to my ongoing badgering of her insight on all of this bc idk how else to explain it:
that sucks about your professors. they obviously have been living under a rock for the past 20 yrs to not know how bad that is. it is bad when it's a skin infection and when it spreads and gets in your blood stream it is SO bad. I couldnt believe that at all. It is such a bad bacteria that when it is as severe as what you had, your body is doing everything it can do fight off the infection and in the mean time, you get weak, sick, are in a lot of pain, etc. Infections that bad basically just run your body into the ground. Was Vancomycin the antibiotic they were giving you? I am so glad you are okay, I for sure understand how bad that is. Most people dont realize that MRSA is a bacteria that is pretty much resistant to everything and once it gets in your blood you have no choice but to go to the hospital and get on IV antibiotics.
I'm sure ill post more bc I swear even when I research it, Taylor has helped me make sense of how it is possible for me to simply drive to my apt from my parents (30 min drive), pick up my dry cleaning, check my mail- and it wears me out so much I was so worn out and weak I slept for 25 hrs straight.
Huge thank u to taylor and everyone else who is still checking up on me.
Love u all
Neat things I experienced because of MRSA
Wednesday, February 11, 2009 12:41 AM
i had an MRI which i thought was kinda cool.
i go back Friday to get on a long term treatment and to find out when i am for sure cleared to live a normal life again!
i'm really hoping Friday goes well- because even anything as much as a fallen eyelash or a minor cut or a temperature can mean I go back to stage one and start the hospital/ experimenting with antibotics all that all over again :(
i drove today for the first time since jan 29! which is exciting! and i even was able to make my bed by myself today! whoooo!!!
so many people wrote to me or my family and prayed for me. there were churches i dont even attend that prayed for me! in fact Meredith- one of my closest friends- found out about my MRSA because her sister heard a prayer request at her church. how amazing is that? also one of my dad's friends is Jewish and apparently there is a wall in Jerusalem or something like that where my name was put on so people couple pray over that prayer wall (i'm unclear on all the details because my mind hasn't been processing things too well since all this happen... but its really awesome nonetheless)
I'm just so blessed that I wasn't one of the 20,000 people that pass away from this awful MRSA stuff! And I am so blessed to have you all as friends.
Everyone who wrote me, or thought of me, or prayed for me, or anything- i can't even begin to tell you how much that means to me!
I would love to tag everyone who wrote me or anyone else in my family- but that would be hundreds of people and I would feel terrible to leave someone out.
I do have to tag Ryan Stavinoha to this - and Sister of course. So please don't get your feelings hurt if I do not tag you. I still love you and appreciate you!
i had an MRI which i thought was kinda cool.
i go back Friday to get on a long term treatment and to find out when i am for sure cleared to live a normal life again!
i'm really hoping Friday goes well- because even anything as much as a fallen eyelash or a minor cut or a temperature can mean I go back to stage one and start the hospital/ experimenting with antibotics all that all over again :(
i drove today for the first time since jan 29! which is exciting! and i even was able to make my bed by myself today! whoooo!!!
so many people wrote to me or my family and prayed for me. there were churches i dont even attend that prayed for me! in fact Meredith- one of my closest friends- found out about my MRSA because her sister heard a prayer request at her church. how amazing is that? also one of my dad's friends is Jewish and apparently there is a wall in Jerusalem or something like that where my name was put on so people couple pray over that prayer wall (i'm unclear on all the details because my mind hasn't been processing things too well since all this happen... but its really awesome nonetheless)
I'm just so blessed that I wasn't one of the 20,000 people that pass away from this awful MRSA stuff! And I am so blessed to have you all as friends.
Everyone who wrote me, or thought of me, or prayed for me, or anything- i can't even begin to tell you how much that means to me!
I would love to tag everyone who wrote me or anyone else in my family- but that would be hundreds of people and I would feel terrible to leave someone out.
I do have to tag Ryan Stavinoha to this - and Sister of course. So please don't get your feelings hurt if I do not tag you. I still love you and appreciate you!
First time talking about my MRSA experience
Sunday, February 08, 2009 10:29 PM
considering the amount of medication im on ad that i've had to take a few days to write this- it probably doesnt make too much sense. but its the best i have been able to collaborate this week.
Warning there are a lot of gross details I had to add. I’d warn u every time before I wrote about them but its all pretty gross
My story is a lot longer, but to try to answer some questions:
Rewind back: In August, I got impetigo - which is like the “strep throat” virus that comes out on your skin… it ended up getting so bad I ended up in the hospital with blood poisoning.
Since then, I’ve had a few more occurrences of out breaks like that- I actually lost half of my hair (fortunately I was able to hide it because the main spot it was falling out was on the lower back side of my head.)
Anyway, so I’m very aware of the “warning signs.”
Wednesday (jan 28), I noticed a small bump on my forehead. Thursday I had work, and called and made an apt with my dr. bc I knew I had to get it checked out. I asked my amazing boss if I could leave at noon (my apt wasn’t til 4) so I could run some errands. Well I ended up going home to change first- and the spot on my forhead had swollen so much I actually had to lacerate it myself (I’ve had to do it many times before when I had different spots). So I cut it open, drained it - gross I know.
Anyway- I go to the my doctor he puts me on antibotics and tells me the same thing as every time I have an infection- if u have a temp, if it gets any bigger/ more tender, etc go to the ER.
So at 5am Friday I wake up to my whole left side of my face is beyond swollen. I literally looked like a monster- seriously just ask anyone who saw the pictures that were taken. I’d put them up but im pretty sure id be single for the rest of my life if I did.
So they took me to the North Cypress Medical Center Hospital place and I tried to hit on the ER male nurse who I was smitten with by saying “I usually don’t look like this… I swear I’m really pretty” seriously the doctors described me later in the week as “looking like I had a face again” so I looked pretty hideous.
On the way to the hospital I sent a picture of myself to my sister and when I remember waking up in my hospital room- sissa was there- she drove in at like 5am from Dallas and stayed with me until Monday.
Oh so I had to have 3 doctors- two of which I hated. One of the doctors was an “infectious disease doctor” I also did not like him (or the other ID doctor I had to see). So after one of my idiot doctors said they could not culture anything - I got one of my main nurses and my sister to be there when I cut the wound myself so they could culture it. I’m trying to be as least disgusting as possible. So its the antiboitic resistant "super bug" MRSA (its been all over oprah and all those shows- look it up). anyway, it kills about 20.000 ppl a year, and luckily i wasn't one!
Anyway- so I stay in the hospital from Friday at 5am to Tuesday late night. I had 30 IVS of antibotics! Also every 4 hours I had morphine and phenogrin in my IV too. if you know anything about phenogrine through IV is its really thick- so my veins collapsed a few times and they‘d have to change my IV to a different spot- my arms still look like someone beat me up- but just on my arms.
Hmm I’m trying to think of what else.
My face is back to normal pretty much. Im still in a lot of pain. Im still taking antibotics, I am summoned to bed rest for at least 2 weeks. So I’ve been sleeping a lot and I have any energy to do like anything besides update my face book.
I did a lot of funny things in there and when I was on all the pain medicine. And was actually really terribly mean to some of the nurses when I was impatiently waiting for my morphine- but I always apologized a whole lot and told them how nice I was when I wasn’t waiting for pain medication.
Thank you all for all your prayers, thoughts, well wishes, good vibes, everything. Its been really scary and we won’t know if we were able “to get it all” and if it will pop back up and when.
considering the amount of medication im on ad that i've had to take a few days to write this- it probably doesnt make too much sense. but its the best i have been able to collaborate this week.
Warning there are a lot of gross details I had to add. I’d warn u every time before I wrote about them but its all pretty gross
My story is a lot longer, but to try to answer some questions:
Rewind back: In August, I got impetigo - which is like the “strep throat” virus that comes out on your skin… it ended up getting so bad I ended up in the hospital with blood poisoning.
Since then, I’ve had a few more occurrences of out breaks like that- I actually lost half of my hair (fortunately I was able to hide it because the main spot it was falling out was on the lower back side of my head.)
Anyway, so I’m very aware of the “warning signs.”
Wednesday (jan 28), I noticed a small bump on my forehead. Thursday I had work, and called and made an apt with my dr. bc I knew I had to get it checked out. I asked my amazing boss if I could leave at noon (my apt wasn’t til 4) so I could run some errands. Well I ended up going home to change first- and the spot on my forhead had swollen so much I actually had to lacerate it myself (I’ve had to do it many times before when I had different spots). So I cut it open, drained it - gross I know.
Anyway- I go to the my doctor he puts me on antibotics and tells me the same thing as every time I have an infection- if u have a temp, if it gets any bigger/ more tender, etc go to the ER.
So at 5am Friday I wake up to my whole left side of my face is beyond swollen. I literally looked like a monster- seriously just ask anyone who saw the pictures that were taken. I’d put them up but im pretty sure id be single for the rest of my life if I did.
So they took me to the North Cypress Medical Center Hospital place and I tried to hit on the ER male nurse who I was smitten with by saying “I usually don’t look like this… I swear I’m really pretty” seriously the doctors described me later in the week as “looking like I had a face again” so I looked pretty hideous.
On the way to the hospital I sent a picture of myself to my sister and when I remember waking up in my hospital room- sissa was there- she drove in at like 5am from Dallas and stayed with me until Monday.
Oh so I had to have 3 doctors- two of which I hated. One of the doctors was an “infectious disease doctor” I also did not like him (or the other ID doctor I had to see). So after one of my idiot doctors said they could not culture anything - I got one of my main nurses and my sister to be there when I cut the wound myself so they could culture it. I’m trying to be as least disgusting as possible. So its the antiboitic resistant "super bug" MRSA (its been all over oprah and all those shows- look it up). anyway, it kills about 20.000 ppl a year, and luckily i wasn't one!
Anyway- so I stay in the hospital from Friday at 5am to Tuesday late night. I had 30 IVS of antibotics! Also every 4 hours I had morphine and phenogrin in my IV too. if you know anything about phenogrine through IV is its really thick- so my veins collapsed a few times and they‘d have to change my IV to a different spot- my arms still look like someone beat me up- but just on my arms.
Hmm I’m trying to think of what else.
My face is back to normal pretty much. Im still in a lot of pain. Im still taking antibotics, I am summoned to bed rest for at least 2 weeks. So I’ve been sleeping a lot and I have any energy to do like anything besides update my face book.
I did a lot of funny things in there and when I was on all the pain medicine. And was actually really terribly mean to some of the nurses when I was impatiently waiting for my morphine- but I always apologized a whole lot and told them how nice I was when I wasn’t waiting for pain medication.
Thank you all for all your prayers, thoughts, well wishes, good vibes, everything. Its been really scary and we won’t know if we were able “to get it all” and if it will pop back up and when.
1st MRSA post... about the diagnosis
Thursday, February 05, 2009 4:57 PM
Thank you for all ur prayers. I'm still in a lot of pain and am very weak... so please keep praying...
I've been discharged from the hospital- the doctors did what they could (I mean 30 IVs of antibotics is a lot and 3 doctors) so I have been released to my parents - they made the guest room into like a sterilized little hospital room. My family has been amazing- I sent sister a picture of my face (where teh infection was) at 5am and by the time I came to in my room- she was there. I'm so blessed.
I'll write more about what happened to me... but this is a little about what it is....
What is MRSA (methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus)?
Some staph bacteria are resistant to antibiotics. MRSA is a type of staph that is resistant to antibiotics called beta-lactams. Beta-lactam antibiotics include methicillin and other more common antibiotics such as oxacillin, penicillin and amoxicillin. While 25% to 30% of the population is colonized with staph, approximately 1% is colonized with MRSA.
http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/dhqp/ar_mrsa_Invasive_FS.html
This fact sheet is a summary of the data presented in theJournal of the American Medical Association 2007;298(15):1763-1771.
The estimated number of people developing a serious MRSA infection (i.e., invasive) in 2005 was about 94,360; this is higher than estimates using other methods.
Approximately 18,650 persons died during a hospital stay related to these serious MRSA infections.
About 14% of all the infections occurred in persons without obvious exposures to healthcare.
Evaluation of the pathogens causing these infections confirmed that most of the strains associated with these serious MRSA infections were caused by strains traditionally associated with healthcare. However, the strains traditionally associated with transmission in the community are now being identified in healthcare.
Thank you for all ur prayers. I'm still in a lot of pain and am very weak... so please keep praying...
I've been discharged from the hospital- the doctors did what they could (I mean 30 IVs of antibotics is a lot and 3 doctors) so I have been released to my parents - they made the guest room into like a sterilized little hospital room. My family has been amazing- I sent sister a picture of my face (where teh infection was) at 5am and by the time I came to in my room- she was there. I'm so blessed.
I'll write more about what happened to me... but this is a little about what it is....
What is MRSA (methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus)?
Some staph bacteria are resistant to antibiotics. MRSA is a type of staph that is resistant to antibiotics called beta-lactams. Beta-lactam antibiotics include methicillin and other more common antibiotics such as oxacillin, penicillin and amoxicillin. While 25% to 30% of the population is colonized with staph, approximately 1% is colonized with MRSA.
http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/dhqp/ar_mrsa_Invasive_FS.html
This fact sheet is a summary of the data presented in theJournal of the American Medical Association 2007;298(15):1763-1771.
The estimated number of people developing a serious MRSA infection (i.e., invasive) in 2005 was about 94,360; this is higher than estimates using other methods.
Approximately 18,650 persons died during a hospital stay related to these serious MRSA infections.
About 14% of all the infections occurred in persons without obvious exposures to healthcare.
Evaluation of the pathogens causing these infections confirmed that most of the strains associated with these serious MRSA infections were caused by strains traditionally associated with healthcare. However, the strains traditionally associated with transmission in the community are now being identified in healthcare.
A questionare about me
Thursday, January 08, 2009 9:56 PM
Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 16 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 16 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you. If I DIDN'T tag you, it is only because 1) you don't post a lot or 2) I assumed you wouldn't be into this.
1. I’m the legal guardian of 2 Russian girls. I call them “my Russians” because there’s no name that I know of that means the girls I guardian over? - Their mother thinks there is something seriously wrong with me bc I’m not married and I don’t have a boyfriend
2. My family and my puppy (Hunter Pug) are the combined group of the funniest people in the world. My sister and I call each other hourly some days to tell each other off the wall things my grandma, grandpa, or mom says and/ or does. For instance, my grandma told me “Kelly, don’t you save yourself for marriage. You sleep with as many men as you want you hear me?” I am cracking up and asking her why, and her response is classic grandma “Because I was an idiot and saved myself for your grandpa. He promised me champagne and after all these years, I think I just got some stale beer!!” Her advice on love, life, and ‘porking’ honestly could make an exhibitionist blush
3. Even though I typically interested in guys that are at least 5yrs older than me, I still want to be Mrs. Robinson when I grow up, or I want to be Ryan Adam’s band-aid for life
4. It takes me over 2 hours to fall asleep even when I’m laying completely still and my eyes are shut in the dark
5. I love the following more than anyone ever should: Christian literature, christian music, chubby children, old couples, double bourbon & diet coke, urbanoutfitters.com online sales, sporting events, concerts, LSU, leftovers, new gadgets- I probably own one of everything that Best Buy sells, the color yellow, The Office, Edward Norton, compliments, being appreciated, postsecret.com, Dr. Phil
6. I am probably too good at finding out information when I want to know something about someone. I can tell you almost everything about anyone I went to elementary, jr. high, and high school with. Their past, their present and usually their future.
7. Even though they have gotten remarkably better- I still have panic attacks on the regular and mostly at these occurrences: EVERY TIME I drive to/ and if I get there- then going into to school, my phone ringing, walking into church, going to a place I‘ve never been…. Pretty much everything but going to work and going to my apt
8. I cant eat meat on a bone & I was a vegetarian for 10 years starting when I was 4 yrs old. The reason is because I only ate ham prior to 4 yrs old and one day my dad told me ham came from Miss Piggy. That was my very first memory. I also can only eat food and drink beverages at room temperature.
9. My very first words were “Ashy Bad” (as in ‘my sister, Ashley is bad’ Ashy= sister. Oh and my sister and I only refer to each other as sister, never by our names. Even Meago calls sister “sister”
10. I honestly believe I walk between raindrops
11. I pray non-stop. Literally I don’t think I could count how many times I pray in a day.
12. I am far too trusting and have never met anyone I didn’t like. I forgive too quickly, over-apologize and over thank people to the point its annoying. I even apologize to inanimate objects like when I bump into tables
13. I’ve saved two people’s lives. First, I have had to give a man the Heimlich maneuver when I was 17 & a lifeguard. Second, this summer a a 39 yr old mans had a diabetic attack and sank to the 12 ft deep lap pool (with Lucas’ help - I have to give him credit too), and then he tried to drown Lucas. I had to stop his mother who happened to be there from giving him insulin bc we didn’t know if his blood sugar was too high or too low. The most intense / scariest 30 minutes of my life.
14. I have NO fat on my arms, legs, or butt. And no matter how much weight I gain it never goes in those 3 areas? I am “double jointed” in every possible way someone can be double jointed in. when I pop my back it sounds like a machine gun- honest. I always said God gave me a good sense of humor because He gave me such funny body
15. A part of me will always believe that no man can stay faithful to any woman. Even with that being said, I am still good friends with everyone of my exes- even the ones I had terrible break ups with.
16. I am the biggest bargain shopper you will ever meet. My whole apt is decorated in stuff from Good Will- I reupholstered like everything. And its super cute if I do say so myself . Im also Anal Annie when it comes to money. When I got my first job at 15, the first thing I did was make a pie chart of how much and where my money would be allocated. Also, when I have panic attacks- the ONLY thing that can calm me down is long division and long multiplication (Like 19 digit numbers multiplied by 17 digit numbers). I also remember all numbers- ppls birthdays, phone numbers, addresses. I have a numeric photogRAPHIC memory.
17. I am consumed with other people’s feelings. The following are some of my extreme examples: when I was little I would swap out a different stuffed animal every night to sleep with- because I didn’t want any of the stuffed animals feelings to be hurt. Growing up I would always sit with people who sat alone at their lunch tables because I felt so awful for someone to feel lonely. I always made good friends with the kids that got picked on in school, and I would always make my boyfriend of the minute (and/ or Douglas) walk with the picked on kid and me to class- so that way no one would mess with them. I can still cry about an episode of Oprah I saw in the 10th grade because this 11 year old was teased at school for being chubby- and she came home one day in tears and told her mom she wanted to die. Within the week, the health problems she was having that caused her to gain weight killed her (I actually started crying just writing that out!!).
18. More of my friends have passed away than my mother, father, and sister have lost combined. Every funeral I have gone to has taken a little more of my soul- but worse, they each force me to relive the day that my best friend Alexis passed away, her funeral, and how I stood along side her mom, dad, and sister when everyone first walked into her wake because we were that much like sisters to each other.
19. Meredith Phillips, Sister, Meago, and my grandma literally saved me this past year. Almost all my favorite people have been some of my closest friends for at least 10 yrs. Oh and I have a love/ hate relationship with Kasey Morse Strait.
Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 16 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 16 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you. If I DIDN'T tag you, it is only because 1) you don't post a lot or 2) I assumed you wouldn't be into this.
1. I’m the legal guardian of 2 Russian girls. I call them “my Russians” because there’s no name that I know of that means the girls I guardian over? - Their mother thinks there is something seriously wrong with me bc I’m not married and I don’t have a boyfriend
2. My family and my puppy (Hunter Pug) are the combined group of the funniest people in the world. My sister and I call each other hourly some days to tell each other off the wall things my grandma, grandpa, or mom says and/ or does. For instance, my grandma told me “Kelly, don’t you save yourself for marriage. You sleep with as many men as you want you hear me?” I am cracking up and asking her why, and her response is classic grandma “Because I was an idiot and saved myself for your grandpa. He promised me champagne and after all these years, I think I just got some stale beer!!” Her advice on love, life, and ‘porking’ honestly could make an exhibitionist blush
3. Even though I typically interested in guys that are at least 5yrs older than me, I still want to be Mrs. Robinson when I grow up, or I want to be Ryan Adam’s band-aid for life
4. It takes me over 2 hours to fall asleep even when I’m laying completely still and my eyes are shut in the dark
5. I love the following more than anyone ever should: Christian literature, christian music, chubby children, old couples, double bourbon & diet coke, urbanoutfitters.com online sales, sporting events, concerts, LSU, leftovers, new gadgets- I probably own one of everything that Best Buy sells, the color yellow, The Office, Edward Norton, compliments, being appreciated, postsecret.com, Dr. Phil
6. I am probably too good at finding out information when I want to know something about someone. I can tell you almost everything about anyone I went to elementary, jr. high, and high school with. Their past, their present and usually their future.
7. Even though they have gotten remarkably better- I still have panic attacks on the regular and mostly at these occurrences: EVERY TIME I drive to/ and if I get there- then going into to school, my phone ringing, walking into church, going to a place I‘ve never been…. Pretty much everything but going to work and going to my apt
8. I cant eat meat on a bone & I was a vegetarian for 10 years starting when I was 4 yrs old. The reason is because I only ate ham prior to 4 yrs old and one day my dad told me ham came from Miss Piggy. That was my very first memory. I also can only eat food and drink beverages at room temperature.
9. My very first words were “Ashy Bad” (as in ‘my sister, Ashley is bad’ Ashy= sister. Oh and my sister and I only refer to each other as sister, never by our names. Even Meago calls sister “sister”
10. I honestly believe I walk between raindrops
11. I pray non-stop. Literally I don’t think I could count how many times I pray in a day.
12. I am far too trusting and have never met anyone I didn’t like. I forgive too quickly, over-apologize and over thank people to the point its annoying. I even apologize to inanimate objects like when I bump into tables
13. I’ve saved two people’s lives. First, I have had to give a man the Heimlich maneuver when I was 17 & a lifeguard. Second, this summer a a 39 yr old mans had a diabetic attack and sank to the 12 ft deep lap pool (with Lucas’ help - I have to give him credit too), and then he tried to drown Lucas. I had to stop his mother who happened to be there from giving him insulin bc we didn’t know if his blood sugar was too high or too low. The most intense / scariest 30 minutes of my life.
14. I have NO fat on my arms, legs, or butt. And no matter how much weight I gain it never goes in those 3 areas? I am “double jointed” in every possible way someone can be double jointed in. when I pop my back it sounds like a machine gun- honest. I always said God gave me a good sense of humor because He gave me such funny body
15. A part of me will always believe that no man can stay faithful to any woman. Even with that being said, I am still good friends with everyone of my exes- even the ones I had terrible break ups with.
16. I am the biggest bargain shopper you will ever meet. My whole apt is decorated in stuff from Good Will- I reupholstered like everything. And its super cute if I do say so myself . Im also Anal Annie when it comes to money. When I got my first job at 15, the first thing I did was make a pie chart of how much and where my money would be allocated. Also, when I have panic attacks- the ONLY thing that can calm me down is long division and long multiplication (Like 19 digit numbers multiplied by 17 digit numbers). I also remember all numbers- ppls birthdays, phone numbers, addresses. I have a numeric photogRAPHIC memory.
17. I am consumed with other people’s feelings. The following are some of my extreme examples: when I was little I would swap out a different stuffed animal every night to sleep with- because I didn’t want any of the stuffed animals feelings to be hurt. Growing up I would always sit with people who sat alone at their lunch tables because I felt so awful for someone to feel lonely. I always made good friends with the kids that got picked on in school, and I would always make my boyfriend of the minute (and/ or Douglas) walk with the picked on kid and me to class- so that way no one would mess with them. I can still cry about an episode of Oprah I saw in the 10th grade because this 11 year old was teased at school for being chubby- and she came home one day in tears and told her mom she wanted to die. Within the week, the health problems she was having that caused her to gain weight killed her (I actually started crying just writing that out!!).
18. More of my friends have passed away than my mother, father, and sister have lost combined. Every funeral I have gone to has taken a little more of my soul- but worse, they each force me to relive the day that my best friend Alexis passed away, her funeral, and how I stood along side her mom, dad, and sister when everyone first walked into her wake because we were that much like sisters to each other.
19. Meredith Phillips, Sister, Meago, and my grandma literally saved me this past year. Almost all my favorite people have been some of my closest friends for at least 10 yrs. Oh and I have a love/ hate relationship with Kasey Morse Strait.
God's Promise- Amazing!
Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone-to have a deep, full relationship with another...to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God, to the Christian says, "No, not until you have given yourself totally and without reservation to me...to have an intensely personal and unique relationship with Me alone...I love you, My child, and until you discover that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with Me - exclusively, apart from any other desires or longings. I want you to stop planning and wishing, and allow me to bring that person to you-you just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things...keep listening and learning the things which I tell you...you just wait.
Don't be anxious...don't worry...don't look around at the things that I've given to others...don't look at those things which you desire...you just keep looking up to Me...or you will miss what I want to show you.
And then, when you are ready, I'll surprise you with a love more wonderful than you would have ever dreamed of...you see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready - until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me...This is perfect love.
I want you to have this wonderful love...I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me and I want you to enjoy life and love...and all that I have for you with all My heart. I love you utterly, Precious One, and always...please believe Me and trust Me."
Don't be anxious...don't worry...don't look around at the things that I've given to others...don't look at those things which you desire...you just keep looking up to Me...or you will miss what I want to show you.
And then, when you are ready, I'll surprise you with a love more wonderful than you would have ever dreamed of...you see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready - until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me...This is perfect love.
I want you to have this wonderful love...I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me and I want you to enjoy life and love...and all that I have for you with all My heart. I love you utterly, Precious One, and always...please believe Me and trust Me."
New Post
I'm moving all my facebook notes onto here.... so that is why they will all have the same day/ time. And a lot of them are about MRSA. I was just having such a tough time and I didn't feel well enough to talk about it out loud at the time. So here come like 100 blogs!
Whew okay. Thanks. Bye!
Whew okay. Thanks. Bye!
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